Happy for the Breath in my Nostrils

Mom was kind of the giveaway to me that everything hadn't been as rosy as she was trying make it sound (with Dad). You know how I am. I can just, I don't really know, FEEL it I guess. I knew she'd been through a lot, and I was just very sad. I'm relieved to hear that Dad is doing well now! It sounds like quite the ordeal.

If it makes you feel better, I've had my own fun ordeal over the past weekend I had another run in with Malaria, and it was worse than before. (Before I get into this, KNOW THAT I'M OKAY NOW!) It all started Saturday with tons of fevers, chills, diahrrea, vomitting, pain through every bone in my body, and the most excruciatingly painful migranes. The pain was just staggering. My conscious mind just resceeded further and further into a world between worlds, and my body was on autopilot, going between the toilet and my bed. I was too weak for anything else. I spent all of Saturday curled up and moaning. I wanted to die. I really did. The pain and the agony was just horrid.

Night came, and around 4am, my body gave out, and I fainted. I awoke on the ground to Elder Liufau asking if I was okay. My mind was clear, so I knew that I didn't hit it hard. I said I was okay, not sure why I was on the ground, but pretty certain I had blacked out. I knew who I was, where I was, and even what year it was (as it had just changed to 2012 only a few hours prior). He helped me back to my bed, and cleaned the various scrapes and bruises on my face (Which are PLENTY! Ha ha ha, I kinda look like the Phantom of the Opera. ;) ), and I crashed again.

My body was really having a hard time. I drank as much water as I could, took the meds I was supposed to, but I was still suffering for all of Sunday. I didn't go anywhere. I just languished. In the evening, I started vomitting again, and there was nothing left in my body. My body was dehydrated, and refusing to take anything to become hydrated. It was terrible.

Mindful of this, Elder and Sister Krumm (my guardian angels) took me to the hospital for a saline IV, which helped so much. At the same time they gave some injections to stop the joint pain and vomitting. Really, the treatment there put me back into shape. On that day (Monday), I ate for the first time again too. The Krumms were making sure I was well-taken care of.

Today is Wednesday, and the first day that I've been permitted to leave the house. The only thing I can do is office work until further notice. It's a little (okay, A LOT!) crappy, but I'm grateful to be alive. I don't really know what happened to me in those few days...

For three days, I wished I could pass away that I might not suffer again as I had suffered. On the fourth day, when I woke, the migranes had subsided, and the vomitting ceased. I had never been so happy to be alive! I hear people all the time say that God gives you the breath in your nostrils every blessed day and that you should be grateful for it, but I've taken it for-granted all this while. Now, I'll never do it again! I think the difference this time was how much help I received this time. The first time I got sick, only my companion helped me, and it was with getting water to flush the toilet and things like that. Elder and Sister Krumm, Elder and Sister Kirkham, Elder Liufau, my district, Elder Esiaba, and the sweet angel nurses at the hospital all contributed to me getting better. I was so darn happy for the breath in my nostrils, no matter how quickly it comes and goes!

You know Dad, I think we both learned something important around the same time. To be alive is such a precious and wonderful thing. But we, considering that our lives aren't always endangered, don't think anything of it. When our lives are put in jeopardy, it helps us to remember the Lord who made that life, and to thank him that we have breath in our lungs this day. I'm grateful today to not be suffering like I was on Saturday and Sunday! The life I have is enough to be grateful for.

I had to reflect a lot on a promise that was given to us missionaries. We were told in the MTC that we'd never get Malaria if we slept under our nets, take our doxy, use the fan (where possible), and use the filter bottle (which doesn't prevent Malaria, but obedience does!). I've done those things!! Why have I gotten Malaria TWICE now? I think the Lord is testing me a little like Job. In life, I've always had everything I needed. I've never had any serious injury or illness. Well, here in Africa, I'm living in quite the opposite state. I have almost nothing. Really, I have my toiletries, some few books, my clothes, and that's about it. My health is not always there. I think the Lord wanted to make sure that I would be valiant even if I was suffering in the physical realm as much as possible without killing me. Sure enough, I passed the test.

So, in the end, was Malaria the most horrid and painful thing that I've ever endured? Clearly yes. For BOTH times I've had it. Was it worth it? Well, I believe that the Lord knows that one. I had a priesthood blessing, so obviously His will was to allow me to be strengthened through this tremendous trial. An experience of a lifetime, that's for sure.

So, just as you made me promise to not be worried about you, you as well should never be worried about me. 100% of missionaries return home from this mission, so what is there to fear? Ha ha ha. I'm happy, I'm learning, and I'm (almost) healthy. (I should be by Saturday or so. No more negative symptoms, just immense fatigue). I was originally planning to not tell you about this, but I appreciate that I was told straightforwardly about Dad, and so I figured I'd return the favor. Again, DON'T WORRY ABOUT ME! Ha ha ha. This mission has safety as #1 priority.

I love you all so much! Dad, take care!

Love,

Elder Vaughan